LSP28: The Burden of Perfection

Ever notice that any good idea, when taken to extremes, can become a bad idea?

From my perspective, the biggest problem with all theories grown from apophatic roots is the burden placed on people to be perfect.

Nobody is perfect, and nobody should be expected by their spiritual leaders to take on the level of personal responsibility required in an apophatic belief system.

Apophatic belief systems are found in every culture and in every major world religion.  Strict monastic lifestyles, as cultivated within Theravada Buddhism and Roman Catholicism, are two examples of this way of life.  But they're not the only examples.  In fact, atheism brings to bear on its adherents the same extreme burden of perfection found within certain religious sects.  This is because all apophatic belief systems (whether theistic, non-theistic, or atheistic) share one major thing in common: an absolute hatred of the humbleness/courage/forgiveness paradigm preached by spiritual teachers such as the Hebrew philosopher Job (author of the Bible's Book of Job) and the Jewish philosopher Jesus (author of the Bible's Kingdom paradigm).

I don't use the word "hatred" lightly.  Apophatic assumptions about consciousness, life, evolution, learning, and relationships are completely different from the assumptions made by cataphatic thinkers.  Apophatics consider Kingdom teachings an affront to their intellectual authority and prowess.

Apophatic beliefs are based on the preeminence of the human mind - on a belief in the ability of the human mind to dramatically alter the universe.  Apophatic teachings, drawing on the natural authority they see in the Materialist laws of cause and effect, are highly anthropocentric.  They see human beings as a group "set apart" by their special mental powers to play a supremely important role in Creation (or on plain ol' Planet Earth, if you're an atheist).  It follows from this (say the apophatics) that human beings have a huge responsibility to themselves and to the planet to scrupulously follow every law they can think of.  Anything short of perfection is considered a failure.  It's therefore not only acceptable but completely necessary to find the flaws in everything you see around you so you can "fix" them.  Inevitably, this leads to the idea that if you always exert the right effort at the right time in the right way (etc., etc.) you - personally - can change the whole world.

Not the world inside you, or the part of the world you're connected to, or the people you know, or the garden you're digging, or the school you're building  . . . but the whoooooole wooooooorld.  And if you fall short of the ultimate goal of achieving full liberation from the cycle of rebirth dictated by the laws of Karma (with the side benefit of using your newfound universal freedom/godhead to help others on Planet Earth escape their suffering), well, then, you're just an awful, unworthy failure, aren't you?  You shoulda tried harder!

So apophatic thinkers are always trying harder, always striving for perfection, always obsessively worshiping.  Or working.  Or counting.  Always rating themselves in comparison to other people.  Always judging others "who aren't trying hard enough."  Always holding grudges, holding onto anger, holding onto denial.  Always refusing to love.  Always refusing to accept.

Meanwhile, cataphatic teachings (as represented by the Kingdom teachings of Jesus) maintain that our universe is guided by both Materialist and non-Materialist laws of science (not just Materialist laws) so it's pretty hard for the limited human mind to figure everything out by itself.  We're responsible for the personal choices we make.  Our inner self - the part each of us is responsible for - is the Kingdom Jesus refers to.  But we're not responsible for the whole universe and everything in it.  It's okay for us to have limits and it's okay for us to lean on others and on God.  It's okay for us to trust God.

It would be easy to say the apophatic thinker sees the glass as half empty and the cataphatic thinker sees it as half full.  But it's much more than that.  It's more along the lines of this: the apophatic thinker sees himself as a very big glass in a very small pond, whereas the cataphatic thinker sees himself as a very small glass in a very big pond.

The apophatic thinker sees himself as a very big glass in a very small pond - but he also thinks he's not yet a big enough glass.  He wants to be so big and so important in the world pond that his glass will be completely full - so full it will allow him to become "one substance" with the Oneness he calls Source (or Money or Success).  He thinks he's so clever and so important in the grand scheme of things that the pond will somehow dry up if he doesn't jump right in there to save it (and everybody in it) by using his "one substance."  He has a Saviour complex.

Perfect Imperfection (c) JAT 2014

Meanwhile, the cataphatic thinker, who sees himself as a very small glass in a very big pond, looks around the pool filled with all manner of life and says, "Hey, this is a beautiful place.  I see a muddy patch over there where I can hang out with my buddies and have some fun.  No one will mind.  It's a big pond, and there's room for everybody.  I'll learn what I can from everyone else.  I'll build something, create something, and share something. Then I'll pick up my garbage, go home, and be grateful for the good (but imperfect) day I've had.  Cool!"

Apophatics don't do cool.

Addendum January 5, 2018:  Interesting research has just been published about the rise of three types of perfectionism among millennials: "Students are feeling more pressure than ever to be perfectionists" by reporter Vanessa Hrvati. According to the article, Dr. Thomas Curran, one of the authors of the scientific study, "described the need to be perfect as a 'hidden epidemic' that could potentially underpin many of the mental health issues students face, ranging from anxiety to depression."


For Further Reflection:

Would it help you to know that, from God's point of view, there's no such thing as a perfect human being?

When God says it's okay for you to be born as a human being on Planet Earth, it's not because God has plans for you to become more "perfect." It's because God has plans for you to know yourself better, to know your fellow angels better, and to know Mother Father God better. But "knowing" yourself is a lot different than matching yourself to a "template of perfection" for an ideal human being. In fact, knowing more about yourself is the very opposite of trying to become an ideal human being. Knowing yourself is essential to the Humbleness paradigm of boundaries and relationships; forcing yourself to be squeezed into the teeny-tiny box of perfectionism means you're not allowed to be who you really are.

Part of the problem is that although we're very different from each other as persons-of-soul (that is, as children of God), God has given all of us very similar biological bodies as human beings. So it's hard for us to accept that it's okay for us to be similar on the outside but radically different from each other on the inside - different in terms of our temperaments, interests, abilities, learning styles, relationship styles, and so on.

If we were to wander around one of the multitudinous ecosystems of Planet Earth, we would see at a glance an abundance of species all around us. We'd notice that no two species are exactly alike. We wouldn't question the reality that each species has unique talents and attributes, talents we cherish and are continually amazed by. (How many people have looked at a hawk and not envied its ability to ride the unseen thermals of the sky?) Further, we'd quickly observe that within each species there are many individual variations of colouring, temperament, adaptability, leadership ability, and longevity. Abundance of talent is what we expect when we look at God's creatures here on Earth. It's supposed to be that way. And we have no trouble accepting that a hawk can't be a hare. Or vice versa.

Except when we look at ourselves. Many of us just can't seem to get past the idea that our outsides are 90% of our story. We reason that if 90% of a hawk's story is in its body, and if 90% of a hare's story is in its body, then 90% of a human's story must also be in its body. This, after all, is the inevitable conclusion that derives from atheistic theories such as natural selection and non-theistic evolution.

Fundamental to atheistic cosmogonies about life on Planet Earth is the belief - nay, the certainty - that there is no soul, so obviously there can be no soul to shape the inner landscape of each unique human being. From this assumption flows the implicit logic that human beings are really just a bunch of interchangeable building blocks. And from this comes the inescapable "fact" that these building blocks must be perfectible if only we can acquire the right knowledge.

Eat this food. Take this pill. Do this exercise. Obey this commandment. Be a prisoner of the DNA you were born with. Don't you dare have the temerity to believe your inner self is a whole lot bigger than your DNA says you are. Lower the bar for yourself. Lower the bar for your children and your neighbours. Be the least you can be. But throw yourself on the mercy of the wise leaders who can tell you how to perfect yourself, and maybe - just maybe - you'll be lucky enough to have a few fleeting moments of Happiness.

When Michelangelo was lying on the scaffolding of the Sistine Chapel so he could paint its famous ceiling, I doubt very much he was thinking about his perfect pasta intake or how many steps he'd walked that day.

And I doubt very much that any other human being could have told the story Michelangelo told in the precise and lasting way he told it.

He was one of a kind, a child of God with a unique inner story and a unique way of sharing it.

As all of us are when we allow ourselves to be who we really are.

LSP25: What About Karma? Does It Fit With Divine Love?

Is it okay for a person on the Spiral Path to believe in Karma?  Is it okay for a person who believes in Divine Love to believe in Karma?

No, it's not okay.  It's not okay because Divine Love and Karma are mutually exclusive theories about Creation.  If you believe in Divine Love, there's no room for Karma.  Meanwhile, if you believe in Karma, there's no room for Divine Love.

October Maples (c) JAT 2014

Simply put, you have to choose.  You have to choose what kind of spiritual tree you want to grow in your garden of life.*  You can start with roots founded in Divine Love, or you can start with roots founded in Karma.  The choice is up to you, because you have free will.  But you need to know that the tree you grow from Divine Love will look very different in 20 years compared to the tree grown from Karma.  Both start from small, vulnerable seeds, which don't look much different from each other in the beginning (as both uphold the importance of moral precepts).  But tend them and feed them year after year and you'll eventually see the differences. 

Where will you see the differences?  You'll see them in the thoughts, feelings, actions, and health issues of your very own brain.  This is because the biological brain is designed to alter its wiring based on the major decisions you make.  If you make a decision to grow the Karma tree in your life, your brain will gradually rewire itself to reflect this decision.  In other words, the spiritual decisions you make will have a huge impact on how your brain works.

There are several factors that make the Karma tree seem very appealing, especially in the early stages of a spiritual journey:

1.  The Karma tree is based on the theory that the entire universe is moral, and that moral choices can't be separated from other kinds of choices.

2.  The moral laws of Karma are absolute.   Absolute rights and absolute wrongs exist, both of which have logical, predictable consequences for each soul.  Therefore, although human beings always have free will, there's really no chance or accident in the world because universal laws of cause & effect will eventually catch up with you (if not now, then in your next life).

3.  Karma is a highly logical, law-based philosophical system that makes perfect sense to logical, law-based human minds.  It demands that each person be 100% responsible for all his or her choices. 

4.  Karma teaches that Justice is absolute, totally fair, and inevitable.

5.  Karma places great power in the hands of human beings.  It's the power to fully comprehend cosmic laws and use those laws to create one's own future.  The universe must bend to human will once we humans grasp its laws.

6.  Karma teaches that the world we live in here (i.e. 3D Planet Earth) can't ever be perfected because its mix of good and evil is an intentional "training ground" for souls. This can never change because the planet's purpose is to be a "middle world" between the heavens above and the hells below.  Social progress is therefore a delusion.

7.  Karma starts with a cyclical understanding of Time.

These seven factors are the key philosophical roots that together create the theory of Karma.  Although these roots sound very logical and fair to most human minds, the big problem is this: these factors, when blended together, create the perfect excuse to avoid the hard work of opening your heart to Divine Love.

Opening your heart to Divine Love takes courage, humbleness, and forgiveness.  This is what Jesus' Kingdom teachings were all about -- opening your heart to Divine Love by finding and using your own courage, humbleness, and ability to forgive.  Courage, humbleness, and forgiveness aren't based in the logical, 3D mind; they're based in the emotional centres of the brain and soul -- the inner place we call the Heart.

The Heart has its own set of rules, but it's not the same set of rules the Mind uses (nor even, for that matter, the same set of rules the body uses).  The Heart sees many colours, tints, and tones where the Mind sees only black and white.

There's nothing in Jesus' understanding of God, Divine Love, or the soul that resembles the roots of the Karma tree.  Jesus was trying to show people how to grow something very different from the Karma tree, something that's built on the needs of the heart AND the mind AND the body AND the soul -- not just the needs of the mind. (Not that you'd know it after 2,000 years of Church teachings based on Paul's thorny, ugly, spiky version of the spiritual tree . . .)

Divine Love isn't a set of transpersonal laws based on pure Mind.  Divine Love is an emotional choice.  It's a choice made by God the Mother and God the Father together.  Because it's a choice -- because it's their choice -- you have absolutely no control over it.  You can't force God to mete out justice the way you see fit.  You can't force God to agree that your neighbour got what he deserved.  You can't force God to say it's okay for you to stop working toward social progress.  You can't force God to agree with the religious choices you make in your life.  You can't force God to agree with your personal assessment of your own cleverness.

You're not nearly as smart as the theory of Karma tells you.  And God isn't nearly as stupid.


* Please see "It's the Roots, Not the Fruits, That Matter" from January 29, 2014.


For Further Reflection:

It should be obvious that if you want to build a relationship with God, you need to sift and sort through the doctrines you hold, then set aside the beliefs that are blocking your relationship skills. There's no point planting seeds for the Tree of Life if you're going to salt the ground around it with toxic beliefs that constantly kill off the tender shoots of new relationship. A small number of religious and philosophical doctrines are so poisonous to your relationship with God that if you insist on hanging onto them, you'll find yourself struck, frustrated, never making progress. One of the most pernicious of these anti-relationship doctrines is the theory of Karma.

Since the late 1800's, Christianity has gradually been exposed to, and influenced by, various Eastern teachings that view Karma as the quintessential philosophical underpinning for morality, justice, personal enlightenment, and piety. Many Christians have been understandably eager to explore the goals and practices of these Eastern traditions in the hope of enriching their own experience of God's presence. It's somewhat difficult, however, to achieve this enrichment if you naively embrace the Materialist cause-and-effect laws of Karma. Karma is, after all, a set of doctrines which, at its very core, shows nothing but contempt for God.

It's no accident that Buddhism is technically a non-theistic religion. The whole point of the Buddha's original teachings was to demonstrate that an efficient system of algorithms could take human beings steadily closer to the Laws of Creation without any need whatsoever for a personal God. It's a brilliant system of logic, to be sure. But, as with any system that relies completely on algorithms, there's no room for the mystery of the Tree of Life. This may explain why many forms of Buddhism have evolved over the centuries to reintroduce the creativity, stories, family traditions, and art that were of necessity snuffed out by the Four Noble Truths.

In the core teachings of Buddhism, algorithms rule. In the teachings of Jesus, differential calculus is the key.

Algorithms have an unfortunate tendency to spawn cultural norms that are rigid, hierarchical, patriarchal, and dependent on Materialist cause-and-effect to explain why some people should be considered superior to others. Christianity, while demonstrating these same harsh aspects many times during its history (not to its credit), has repeatedly been subject to countervailing "eruptions" of horizontal inclusiveness and respect for women and children. These periodic "eruptions" of Divine Love have been made possible because Christianity has built-in doctrines that deal with flow rates; that is, doctrines that encourage change and learning and healing and experiences of redemption over time -- time that's understood as linear, not cyclical (which makes a huge difference as far as the biological brain is concerned).

Not every Christian has accepted that humbleness is a necessary aspect of relationship with God, but some have. Many Jews have seen the calculus of faith, as well. It's the willingness to be flexible in all our relationships (including our relationship with God) that lets us bend and grow with the wonders of the Tree of Life.

As I said above, if you're sure the Tree of Karma is right for you, than by all means stick with it. But don't expect it to bear the same fruit as the Tree of Life. And don't pretend the Tree of Karma is a viable path to feeling God's presence in your life when Karma's very purpose is to justify your personal quest to become a self-contained god yourself.

You can either have a path that leads you to Mother Father God or a path that leads you to self-sanctification/self-divination. But you can't have both.

Full disclosure: you have the right to choose whatever you like; but your angels have the right to have an opinion on your choices. So if you keep insisting you're a long lost spark of the Divine who's desperately trying to reclaim your rightful godhood (Gnosticism), or keep proclaiming you're trying to escape from suffering through self-transcendence/no-self (Buddhism), you can expect to get some feedback from your guardian angels about your arrogance and narcissism and lack of respect for God's wisdom.

They'll still love you and forgive you, though.

LSP15: Why I Don't Use Traditional Meditation Techniques

There's a reason why I don't meditate.

I don't meditate because traditional Buddhist meditation practices damage the health of the brain-soul nexus.* Since it's the brain-soul nexus that allows me to connect with God in the Core, I won't do anything to jeopardize the connection. This means (among other things) that I refuse to meditate.

I refuse to tell my brain to stop doing its job so I can have a rest from my own thoughts and emotions.  My brain comes pre-wired with a set of more effective tools I can use whenever I need a rest.

The most important of these tools is sleep. A solid 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep is one of the most powerful spiritual tools available to you. It's free. It's available to everyone (barring circumstances such as parenthood or illness). It's highly effective. And the healing mechanisms that kick in while you're asleep come pre-loaded in your DNA.

I know of people who get up early or stay up late so they'll have time to meditate or pray each day.  They cut short their sleep-time -- sleep-time that's required for optimal brain-soul health -- so they can voluntarily put their brains into "low-emotion mode." The brain's "low-emotion mode" is a lot like your computer's sleep mode: the power's on, but nobody's home. The power's on, but you're choosing not to use your full emotional computing capacity to be the best human being you can be. The power's on, but you're choosing to ignore what it means to love.

"Jesus said: 'The Pharisees and the scribes have taken the keys to knowledge and have hidden them. They did not go in, and they did not permit those desiring to go in to enter. You should be clever as snakes and innocent as doves'" (Gospel of Thomas 39a-b). Emerald Tree Boa at the Metro Toronto Zoo. Photo credit JAT 2017.

Let's face it -- while you spend an hour focusing only on your breathwork, you're not reflecting on your relationships or working to forgive a harmful choice or learning something new that you didn't know yesterday. You're not choosing to love somebody. You're not choosing to engage in active contemplation of humbleness and love. You're not choosing love.

What . . . you thought love was an instinctive process that didn't require any effort on your part?

It's fine to begin the process of active contemplation by sitting quietly, slowing your breathing, and relaxing your brain. Sometimes this starting point is called "centering." Centering is helpful. But choosing to meditate so you can escape from your own emotional self -- not so helpful.

I understand how wonderful it can seem at first to be able to sit down and not have to listen to all the annoying, confusing, stressful thoughts going round and round in your head. This is the great appeal of intensive meditation practice. But there's a huge cost to this kind of practice, and you need to know about it. You need to know that if you place your spiritual eggs in the meditation basket, the long term cost will be a greater sense of distance between you and God, not a smaller sense of distance.

I'm not being cruel or judgmental here. I'm being rigorously scientific. Traditional Buddhist meditation practices are specifically designed to create an internal experience that matches the outward belief in "dependent origination." In this context, meditation is a highly effective practice for those who wish to focus solely on human will without regard for the needs of relationship with a personal God (Buddhism being a non-theistic philosophy). Meditation does exactly what it claims to do: it does a very good job of helping people shut down the painful emotional centres related to love, grief, trust, forgiveness, and humbleness.

However, since you need all these emotional centres in order to feel your connection with God's love, the one thing pure meditative practice cannot do is help you get closer to God. Even though it can be painful to deal with love, grief, trust, forgiveness, and humbleness, these emotions are part of the soul, and you can't deny these feelings or ignore them if you want to get closer to God. Instead, you have to learn to work with them in positive and mature and transformative ways. (Jesus called this "entering the kingdom of the heavens.")

Major world religions share one universal characteristic: each religion has thousands and thousands of theories and doctrines and traditions about who God is, how Creation came into being, and how human beings should correctly understand their relationship with Creation. It's so complicated that no human brain can make sense of it all.

It's no wonder, then, that it never occurs to us that building a relationship with God might actually mean using the ordinary tools we already have inside our bodies and brains -- the tools we're born with because God put them there through the process of evolution.

In other words, God, the great scientist, expects you not to waste the healing gift of sleep.


* Because Pure Land Buddhism focuses on love and empathy, I partially exclude this tradition from my general remarks on meditation -- though only partially.


Addendum October 19, 2017: In a Scientific American post on October 11, 2017, writer Bret Stetka reviews some of the recent research into meditation and mindfulness-based interventions: "Where's the proof that mindfulness meditation works?" 

Addendum November 6, 2017: In a Scientific American post on October 31, 2017, psychology professor Cindi May writes about a large mindfulness study involving adolescents: "Mindfulness Training for Teens Fails Important Test"

Addendum December 1, 2019: It's generally supposed that meditation practitioners experience only positive effects from the practice. Here are two articles that remind us the reality is more nuanced. One is a 2019 essay called "The Problem of Mindfulness" by Sahanika Ratnayake. The other piece, "There's a dark side to meditation that nobody talks about" by Lila MacLellan from 2017, briefly reviews some of the challenging issues of meditation.

Addendum February 7, 2021: Here's another article that presents a balanced picture about the practice of mindfulness: "How too much mindfulness can spike anxiety" by David Robson, posted February 4, 2021 on the BBC.

Addendum November 29, 2021: A recent study suggests that independent-minded individuals can become less altruistic and more selfish when using certain mindfulness techniques. The study is reviewed in "How mindfulness could make you selfish" by David Robson, posted August 16, 2021 on BBC Worklife.

 

For Further Reflection:

Have you ever asked yourself why meditation places such an important role in the life of a devout Buddhist? Is it a simple tool, a spiritual practice to help you advance toward the goalless goal of happiness and compassion? Or is it something more, an internal path of immanence that may guide you eventually to the bliss of Oneness (i.e. dependent origination) if your faith is strong enough? Is meditation less a practice and more a sacrament? If so, can this sacrament be detached from its Buddhist roots and applied neutrally to other faith traditions without any consequences?

People who have grown up in the Christian tradition are familiar with the power of sacraments to change how we choose to relate to each other and to Creation. Sometimes, during great crises, it's only our connection to the power of sacraments that keeps us from falling apart.

In most mainline Protestant churches, there are only two sacraments: Baptism and the Eucharist. In the Roman Catholic church, seven sacraments are recognized: Baptism, Penance, Confirmation, Marriage, Eucharist, Holy Orders, and Anointing of the Sick. In the Eastern Orthodox tradition, the concept of sacraments is broader and more fluid. And in various aboriginal religions, the concept is broader still.

Regardless of religious tradition, however, human beings are drawn to the mystery of sacraments, to the places, symbols, and experiences that help us feel connected to God and all Creation. We crave such sacraments and we feel quite lost when they're stripped away from us. The history of iconoclasm shows us that whenever our leaders try to eradicate our heart-based connection to the sacred, we rebel. Even Buddhism has rebelled through its imagery, its architecture, its mandalas and prayer wheels, and its other sacred symbols of the teachings.

Because Christian sacraments typically involve external rituals and symbols, we tend to think of them as, well, external. It doesn't occur to us to think of Buddhist meditation -- an internal experience, if ever there was one -- as a sacrament. But it fulfills every need of a sacrament because it embodies in a biological way the cosmogonical doctrines of the religion. Every time you engage in meditation as a Buddhist, you're reminded of the cosmogonical doctrine of dependent origination, and you're striving to match every aspect of your life to that doctrine. This is no different than what Pauline Christians do when they take the Eucharist and remind themselves they must try harder to match their lives to the pattern of Jesus Christ, whom they believe was with God at the beginning of time.

Sacraments link theoretical doctrine to daily life, but sacraments differ from religion to religion because the theories of God differ from religion to religion. The sacraments are like the outer branches of the spiritual tree; they can only grow from the specific roots that nourish them.

There's no doubt from a scientific perspective that traditional Buddhist meditation techniques affect the wiring of the human brain in distinctive ways. All religious practices, regardless of origin, have some sort of effect on the brain if they're repeated often enough. So the question you need to ask yourself is this: do you want to enthusiastically embrace a practice -- a sacrament -- that's specifically designed to help you overcome the idea that you need a personal God in your life?

Or would it be more helpful for you to graciously accept the right of all people to choose their own path, and then humbly go your own way without fear that you're messing up your own quest?

LSP14: To Be God Is to Give Up the Power and the Glory

I must have watched Peter Jackson's Lord of the Rings trilogy at least ten times before it dawned on me that I was watching the story of our Divine Mother and Father.

So a pop quiz for you today: in The Lord of the Rings films, who do you think represents God the Mother and who do you think represents God the Father?

How many people said Arwen and Aragorn? Or Eowyn and Aragorn? Or Galadriel and Gandalf? Or (since there are so few female characters) maybe Gandalf and Aragorn?

In our culture, we've been heavily conditioned to assume that Creation exists as a hierarchy. The lowly, unworthy people are at the bottom. The chosen people with the special powers and the special bloodlines are all at the top. We just take it for granted that if we could see Heaven as it was in the beginning, long, long ago and far, far away, it would look like a scene from a magnificent royal court. Or an ancient cathedral with shining stained glass windows. Or a magical realm like Lothlorien. Or a great city like Minas Tirith.

What if I were to tell you it's the story of two humble hobbits on a quest to destroy a ring of power that most resembles the early story of our divine Mother and Father?

"Stromboli Eruption" by Wolfgangbeyer at the German language Wikipedia. Licensed under CC BY-SA 3.0 via Wikimedia Commons - http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Stromboli_Eruption.jpg#/media/File:Stromboli_Eruption.jpg

The Lord of the Rings is a story about the only two people in Middle Earth who have the willpower to overcome the ring's terrible temptations and still remain themselves when all others would fail and fall into shadow.

At its heart, it's a story about the "twoness" of the struggle. Galadriel tells Frodo that to be a ringbearer is to be alone, but, in truth, Frodo is never alone in his quest. Frodo and Sam carry the ring together. They depend on each other every step of the way. They're two very different people -- alike in some ways, very unalike in others. Like carbon and iron hammered together to make steel, they become each other's strength. And because of the enduring strength of their "twoness" -- their "two-as-one" trust in each other -- they accomplish together what no one on Middle Earth could have accomplished alone.

Frodo and Sam are humble. Deeply, deeply humble. They have no desire to be worshipped. The power and glory offered by the ring hold no allure for either of them (well, most of the time, except for a couple of rough moments). What Frodo and Sam care about is protecting their friends and doing what's right. Unlike Gollum, who is obedient to the ring, Frodo and Sam struggle up the mountain to try to undo the ring's near-absolute control over other people's minds, talents, and free will. The hobbits' choice to put humble love ahead of limitless power -- even at the cost of their own lives -- becomes the turning point for a whole world.

Our beloved Mother and Father once faced this choice long, long ago, and they chose the path of humble love. They also chose to abolish the hierarchy represented by the One Ring and replace it with a paradigm based on Courage. Because of this, the entire universe changed forever.

Our Mother and Father remain the steel that is hammered from carbon and iron. They remain the two who are one, the softness and hardness, the life force and holding force, the fire and ice, and all things in between. They have made a great place within their hearts that we can call home, and they are the greatest among us because they think of themselves as the least -- just simple hobbits, one female, one male, going about their business of making life comfortable for those they love with all their hearts.

They are our inspiration and blessing. Through their example, we, their children, know what it is to love.

They are truly beyond amazing.

LSP13: How I Met Your Mother: A Divine Love Story

When you're very, very big and very, very smart, it's not easy to be humble.

This is a truth we can see during our lives as human beings. All around us, we lament what happens to our lives when certain individuals and groups decide they're better than other people.

We see what happens when individuals and groups who have more money, more education, more ideas, and more influence refuse to help other people with these gifts, but instead use these gifts to abuse. We see how the fruits of "chosenness" destroy peace in our world. We see how peace isn't possible when it's more important for us to be "better" and "chosen" than "egalitarian" and "humble" toward our neighbours. And we see how hard it is for individuals of great privilege to consider themselves no more important than anybody else on Planet Earth.

This is obvious to us as human beings, but it's not obvious to us at all during our lives as angels, as persons-of-soul, as children of God on the Other Side. So when our beloved Mother and Father tell us their ancient love story -- "How I Met Your Mother" -- there are parts of the story that just don't make any sense to us. Many angels are shocked and baffled by the early part of the story, the part where two "big and smart" people meet in the jungle of pre-Big-Bang energy fields and try very hard to outsmart and outdo each other because neither one knows anything about humbleness or love.

The details of their story are personal and private, of course, as you'd expect when we're talking about our divine parents, but suffice it to say that these two very different consciousnesses found redemption in the joy that comes from being humble.

I call this photo Divine Love. It's another one of the photos I took with a fogged over lens at the Etobicoke conservatory. Divine Love is soft, kind, mysterious, puzzling, a bit hard to put labels on, and much easier to see with your peripheral vision than with the focused vision in the centre of your eye. It's almost as if you're using your eyes to hear God's quiet voice. Photo credit JAT.

Over the years, I've come across a small number of people who understand that God the Mother and God the Father -- far from being aloof, transcendent, and unemotional -- are, in fact, truly humble. They're both very, very big and very, very smart, but they don't think they're "better" than any of their children. Their immense love -- the love that so many humans have felt over the centuries -- is only possible because of their humbleness.

As our human lives teach us, humbleness is not inevitable. It's a choice. It's an exercise of free will -- an exercise of free will that's so brave it's almost beyond comprehension (which is why some of us come here to figure it out). It's a choice to be totally honest about who you are and what you can do (thereby not denying your talents) while at the same time you're deeply grateful for somebody's else's talents. There's no jealousy, no envy, no competition. No power games, no worship, no glory. There's just tons and tons of gratitude.

This is what it's like to live on the Other Side as a person-of-soul. This is what it's like to be a child of God who's loved for who you really are. The feeling of being safe in Divine Love is the feeling of being safe in yourself. No one will judge you or demand that you change because your favourite colour is pink instead of black. There's no fear involved in simply being you. Humbleness is one of the anchoring points of this safety.

Just as we're called to open our hearts to our human neighbours and honour them with the gift of humbleness (thereby participating in the experience of divine redemption), so are we called to offer the same safety and dignity to our blessed Mother and Father. Go ahead and be awed and amazed by the wonder of who they really are -- I'm amazed by them all the time! -- but don't diminish your relationship with them by insisting you're unworthy of their love and trust. They don't see it that way (despite what you've been told by religious leaders). They see you as one of their children, no matter what you did yesterday that wasn't so nice.

Instead of getting on your knees to pray, stand up, hold onto your neighbour's hand, look God right in the eye, and be honest about how much your heart is hurting and how much help you need during your time as a human being on Planet Earth. Be humble. Admit you don't know everything and can't do everything. Ask for help in being the best "frail mortal human being" you can be. Ask for help in being who you really are.

It's all anyone can do.


For Further Reflection:

Have you ever had the feeling that no matter how hard you try to move forward on your spiritual path, you're constantly blocked?

You're not alone. Most people have this feeling. I had it during the early years of my own journey, and I still remember how discouraged and frustrated I felt.

I was sure I was doing everything I was supposed to be doing (that is, what spiritual and religious leaders had told me to do). I logically concluded that the practices themselves were fine -- because so many spiritual leaders agreed on the merits of intercessory prayer, fasting, meditation, self-dissolution, and the like -- so if the practices weren't working . . . the problem must be me!

It didn't occur to me for the longest time that I wasn't the problem. It was the ancient and very popular spiritual practices that were the problem.

Even after my guardian angel told me countless times that I was worthy of God's love and forgiveness, I didn't want to believe him. I assumed I just wasn't trying hard enough to master those ancient spiritual practices, so I redoubled my efforts. Then tripled them.

What I got for all my trouble was a sense of being further away from God.

Divine Love, as it turns out, is not about Oneness. It's about Humbleness. It's about feeling wonder and gratitude for our differences. It's about rejoicing in our unique talents and using them to benefit others. It's about encouraging our loved ones to see themselves as beautiful. It's about having a shared morality based on boundaries -- respectful, mature, courteous boundaries. Without a proper understanding of boundaries, it's too easy for the really big, really smart people to take advantage of those who have different gifts.

A morality of boundaries (Divine Love) is the complete opposite of a morality of Oneness.

Many of the spiritual practices endorsed today evolve directly from a morality of Oneness. The practices make perfect sense if your goal is to achieve a sense of Oneness, a sense of blurred boundaries, a sense of transcending yourself.

But getting closer to God actually means building "new and improved" boundaries, not dissolving your boundaries. To feel Divine Love, to feel God's presence in your life, you need to start from scratch by asking God to help you learn about the spiritual practice of Humbleness.

Just so you know . . . in doing so, you'll be giving up any pretense of chosenness or election or spiritual enlightenment or Ascension. You'll simply be asking to know yourself better and to know your Divine Parents better.

From the tree trunk of Humbleness spring the fruits of deep connection with a humble God.

It's through finding your own Humbleness that you'll share in the Divine Love story of a Mother and Father who love you very much.

LSP11: Some Great Films about Humbleness

If Family Feud asked, "What's the hardest thing you've ever done?" what do you think the answers would be?

From the friends and family you know, you'd get answers such as these: "Finished school."  "Said no to my cheating boyfriend."  "Admitted I have a drinking problem."  "Lost 77 pounds."  "Beat cancer."

From the angels you know (but can't see), you'd get these answers: "Struggled to know who he really is. Kept trying to learn how to trust herself. Learned how to recognize his strengths and also his absences-of-strength. Admitted she made a mistake."

Show me . . . Learned about Humbleness!

The humbleness of the soul is something very, very different from the religious humility taught over the centuries by sages and saints. Humbleness is the sweet spot that major world religions don't teach you to find because humbleness is a very dangerous thing. Humbleness is one of the tumblers on the lock that allows you to be in full relationship with God as a human being. Unlock the mystery of humbleness and your journey on the spiral path speeds up from a slow crawl to a brisk walk.

Humbleness is a difficult concept to convey because it's not a single "value" or "emotion." It's more like a rich tapestry. It's about knowing yourself. It's about liking yourself. It's about knowing your neighbour. It's about liking your neighbour. It's about acceptance. And courage. And honesty -- lots and lots of honesty. It's about doing the right thing even when it's harder to do the right thing than the wrong thing. And it's about heart. There's no humbleness without the heart.

Since it's hard to put into words, I've compiled a list of some films that do a great job of showing you what I mean by humbleness. This isn't a complete list, by any means. But these are some films that strike me as being especially honest about what it means to know yourself -- what it means to be earnestly you!

First, some films based on characters who already know themselves, who already know their strengths and absences-of-strengths and use their knowledge of themselves to help others (even though they aren't perfect and don't know everything):

• Legally Blonde
• Babe
• Crocodile Dundee
• High Noon
• Blindness
• Shrek
• Heaven Can Wait/Down to Earth
• The Sound of Music
• The Miracle Worker (the Anne Sullivan character)
• Blast from the Past

Next, a list of films where the characters don't know themselves at the beginning, and have to struggle against confusion, fear, and loneliness to find humbleness and redemption (that is, they have to open up their hearts to acceptance and honesty about themselves and others):

• The Wizard of Oz
• A Christmas Carol
• The Bridge on the River Kwai
• The Miracle Worker (the Helen Keller character)
• Beauty and the Beast
• The Count of Monte Cristo (the 2002 version)
• How the Grinch Stole Christmas (the 1966 animated version)
• Rudolph, the Red-Nosed Reindeer (the stop-motion animated version)
• Groundhog Day (my all-time favourite)

Great works of science fiction and fantasy have a way of getting under the skin of the brain-soul nexus. I'm sure you can think of many examples of speculative fiction that examine the theme of redemption in compelling ways. Pictured here is "Regina 2049," digital print by Jamie MacDonald.

Most of the people I know can relate a lot better to the second set of films than the first. My own journey felt a helluva lot like Groundhog Day at first. And I've known quite a few people who've trapped themselves in the starring role of Ebenezer Scrooge and don't know how to get themselves out of a lifetime of selfishness.

The trick is to trust that you can get out as long as you have the right help.

Learning about Humbleness isn't something you can do on your own. You need feedback from other people, and you need to have the chance to offer others feedback, too.

Instead of a Family Feud, it's a family partnership where we lift each other up instead of beating each other down. Doesn't that sound like a family you'd like to be part of?


For Further Reflection:

If the theories you have about God, Creation, the soul, and the afterlife can be said to be the roots of the spiritual tree you're growing, then Humbleness is the sturdy trunk.

As you would expect, Humbleness starts out small in your life, like the trunk of a new seedling. But if you protect the vulnerable roots and the distinctive leaves struggling to open themselves to the light of Peace, the trunk will continue to grow stronger each year.

In the analogy of the spiritual tree, most people would guess that the trunk of the tree is made of Divine Love. This isn't a bad guess, because, after all, everyone draws nourishment and strength from Divine Love. But in this analogy, Divine Love is the mysterious underground energy that originates in the two hub trees -- the Tree of Life and the Tree of Moral Knowledge -- and that flows back and forth among the trees of spiritual growth to sustain them.

Humbleness, on the other hand, is a complex tapestry of emotions that allows you to use your soul talents wisely and for the benefit of others.

What are soul talents? They're the aspects of yourself that allow you to not only think with your Mind and feel with your Heart as a soul, but allow you to act in Creation with free will. Your talent aspects are kind of like your soul hands and your soul feet and your soul voice. They allow you to make things and move things and speak things. Your talent aspects allow you to take ideas and feelings and turn them into beautiful, lasting creations.

Every soul -- including you -- has a unique combination of soul talents. When you incarnate as a human being, you bring some of these soul talents with you. (They're hardwired into your DNA.) Your soul talents start to manifest quite early in life, but if you fail to develop your Humbleness (that is, your emotional maturity) in tandem with your talents, you'll grow up to be a boastful, envious, narcissistic, selfish adult who has lots of talent but no awareness at all of how to use these talents wisely.

In other words, you'll grow up in state of metaphorical blindness -- blindness to the true potential of your talents, blindness to the talents of others, and blindness to the talents of God.

There's a reason that Jesus son of Joseph spoke so often of the need to open your eyes and your ears and your heart (e.g. Mark 8: 14-21). He was talking about Humbleness, about learning to know God through seeing and hearing and feeling God's creations without being envious of God's many talents.

You'd be surprised how many people are envious of God's many talents and how many people try to steal from God because they don't want to go through the trouble of learning to use their own talents with maturity.

Your angels know what your soul talents are and what your soul talents aren't.

And you don't get to pick, no matter how badly you want to be a famous superstar.