LSP30: Spirituality: Don't Let It Become Your Personal Addiction Playground

I wrote the following paragraphs in response to a question posted recently in an online spirituality forum.  The question was, "Why must those who claim to be Spiritual be so afraid of honest debate?"

Honest debate is a good antidote for the problems created by top-down philosophical authority (a.k.a. Revelation).  But first it's helpful to understand the obstacles that get in the way of honest debate.

________________________________________________________

It's easier to see the effects of status addiction in spheres of life such as politics or business, as a recent article in The Atlantic by Jerry Useem highlighted: https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2017/07/power-causes-brain-damage/528711/. But the same thing happens in spiritual and religious circles because, like it or not, we only have so many brain networks. The biological networks you use to build knowledge, authority, relationships, and organizational planning in the business world are the same networks you use to build knowledge, etc., in the religious or spiritual world. You can't separate the networks (though many unethical spiritual teachers will tell you you can). So if you're vulnerable to the problems of addiction -- especially status addiction -- you're not immune to the problems caused by too much power or too much infallibility in the spiritual world. Like everybody else, you have to deal with the biology God has given you -- not the biology you'd like to think you have. Photo credit JAT 2017.

Another point to consider is the neuroscientific perspective, since a person who's on a spiritual path is still a human being who's dealing with all the realities of biology, chemistry, and physics. 

The human brain is vulnerable to addiction issues. (Actually, many other species are vulnerable to addiction issues, too, but this isn't the place for that discussion.) Addiction issues can really get in the way within spiritual circles, especially when the addiction is to status.

Status addiction is a physiological addiction -- a biological addiction -- that's no different (as far as the brain is concerned) than better known addictions such as alcohol or substance abuse. It hasn't been examined much in scientific studies. I hope this lack of scientific interest will soon change.

Status addiction often expresses itself as the "Right to Be Right" -- a psychological need to present a belief or an opinion as a "universal truth" that can't be challenged. This status-driven "Right to Be Right" is often seen in both scientific and theological circles, where the payoff for being "right" can be quite large. (Note that acquiring money isn't the key issue here; acquiring status points is the goal, so an ascetic who's given up all money and belongings can still be suffering from a self-devouring status addiction.)

When a status addict's "Right to Be Right" is challenged, he or she will respond as all addicts do (until they begin to confront their personal addictions): they'll do whatever they have to do to protect their daily "fix."

I've had personal encounters with a number of status addicts who've chosen the spiritual world as their personal addiction playground, and let me tell you -- it ain't pretty when you confront them.

As with any form of addiction, a Twelve Step Program could prove very helpful for dealing with the intense cravings of status addiction and the unloving behaviour that often results.

Hope this helps.

Blessings,
Jen

LSP20: A New Spin on the Old Seven Deadlies

We've all heard about the seven deadly sins. In the Christian tradition, pride, envy, anger, lust, greed, sloth, and gluttony are the usual contenders for the crown of worst human traits ever. Even if you don't agree with the Church's teachings on why we're sinful, it's pretty hard to argue with the fact that human beings do awful, awful things to themselves, each other, and the planet because of pride, anger, and the rest.

When people behave badly, they often look to religion to explain their behaviour and give them tools to change their behaviour in the future. Sometimes people want to change because they're afraid their souls will end up in hell. Other times people want to change because they're tired of not being able to like themselves or trust themselves. Either way, they're up against the dreaded topic of ethics and morality.

Can you actually be happy or feel your connection with God if you don't try your best to be ethical or moral?

A lot of people have simply given up on the idea of trying to be ethical and trying to live a moral life. They pretend on the surface to care about ethics, and they're quick to express their shock and outrage on Twitter, but when they're asked in their own lives to make moral choices, they don't have the tools to actually do it. What's worse, they don't know why they don't have the tools.

It's almost impossible to tackle a major psychological and spiritual issue if you don't understand at a logical, rational, scientific level why you're doing what you're doing. You need a solid explanation to stand on, so to speak, a solid explanation to help ground you and keep you sane as you struggle to change and make new choices.

As we know, the Church's explanation for why you're being proud, envious, angry, lustful, greedy, slothful, and gluttonous is Sin with a capital "S." Various Eastern and New Age teachings have trumped Christianity's Sin by claiming that all your unloving behaviour is an illusion anyway, an illusion you can escape through your own hard work and discipline.

I offer an entirely different explanation. I suggest (because it's what I've been taught through my mystical connection with God the Mother, God the Father, and other angels in the Core) that almost all human beings are wrestling with the challenges of status addiction. It's status addiction -- not Sin, not karma, and not evil forces -- that's wrecking your life.

Status addiction tricks your brain into thinking you look like this . . .

What is pride? Pride is what you "feel" when the addicted parts of your brain sense your hoard of status points is being threatened.

What is envy? Envy is what you "feel" when the addicted parts of your brain suspect your neighbour has acquired some status points you "rightfully" deserve.

. . . when really, from the point of view of God, your angels, and your own soul, your status-addicted brain looks more like this. Status addiction saps the creativity, intuition, and sense of meaning and purpose from your life. If you want to get closer to God, you need to be honest with yourself about what status addiction is doing to your brain.

What is anger? Anger is what you "feel" when the addicted parts of your brain suspect your neighbour has tried to steal status points from you.

What is lust? Lust is what you "feel" when the addicted parts of your brain justify your plan to invade somebody else's personal boundaries to steal some of their status points.

What is greed? Greed is the addictive high you feel at the very thought of acquiring some new status points.

What is sloth? Sloth is the state of denial about your addiction disorder.

What is gluttony? Gluttony is a secondary addiction disorder (a co-morbid disorder) that easily arises in the brain of a person who's already experiencing another addiction disorder (in this case, the addiction to status).

That's status addiction in a nutshell.

Now here's the big question.

How many people do you know who have managed all on their own, without any help from anyone else, to personally recognize, confront, cope with, and completely heal their own major addiction disorders (e.g. addiction to opioids, pornography, perfectionism)?

I'm guessing not many.

It takes a community to build a culture based on status addiction, and it's going to take a community to confront and heal the catastrophic problems caused by this addiction.

The first step in healing any addiction is self honesty. The second is recognizing a higher power that can give you strength.

God, please help us with this great task!

Amen.


For Further Reflection:

You may have noticed as you read this post that when the seven deadly sins are defined as "shades" or "colours" of status addiction, it's easier to see how these behaviours violate the morality of boundaries, the morality that guides all loving actions in God's universe.

Almost everyone has been in the position of feeling what it's like to have your personal boundaries invaded.

Invasion of personal space can take many forms, from the innocuous (a neighbour who stands an inch or two too close to you) to the violent (a trusted professional who sexually assaults your children). Occasionally, invasions of personal space involve tangible weapons (e.g. knives, guns, or fists) that leave marks on your physical body, marks that other people can see and sympathize with. More often than not, though, the chosen weapons are things that can't be seen with the human eye: cruel remarks that cut you down and make you feel bad about yourself; intentional manipulation that tricks you into lowering your defences so your reputation or money can be stolen from you; denial and deceit that steal your voice; physical intimidation that threatens to steal your livelihood if you refuse to submit to sexual advances; aggressive demands that you obey, even worship, your abusers lest you be ejected from your family or community and left to fend for yourself.

All invasions, however, share a common thread: a sense that someone has stolen a piece of your personal safety.

As with other forms of injury, small cuts and bruises to your sense of personal safety can, and should be, healed in short order. But major assaults, such as attempted murder, rape, or spiritual violations, leave large holes that take years to heal and always leave scars no matter how loving and forgiving you are. Coping with such major injuries can become a full-time job, making it difficult for you to apply your time, energy, and talents to anything but survival.

If it were true, as so many spiritual leaders are currently claiming, that the path to spiritual enlightenment is eradication of boundaries and transcendence of the self, then we would expect to see great benefits accrue to all cultures that oppose boundaries and endorse Oneness. We would expect to see less suffering, greater prosperity, more happiness, and more cultural creativity in dictator-driven Communist societies; totalitarian and fascist regimes; fundamentalist sects; and certain Buddhist and New Age communities -- places that have given us the chance to observe the long term effects of practising Oneness.

We do not, in fact, see such benefits. Instead, we see the opposite.

Cultures and religions that embrace a morality of personal boundaries have done a particularly good job of reducing suffering and maintaining happiness while at the same time offering opportunities for individuation, creative self expression, mutual self respect, and the quest for Meaning.

In order for you to build and maintain your relationship with Mother Father God, you need to begin to examine the ways in which status addiction is punching holes through your personal sense of safety. You're not just looking for situations where other people are trying to steal from you; you're looking for the ways in which your own habits, ideologies, and unchallenged beliefs are deceiving you into stealing from yourself.

This is what all forms of addiction boil down to: allowing some parts of your brain (especially your reward and pleasure pathways) to steal from other parts of your human self (such as your soul-related Meaning networks).

At the start of every spiritual journey, there's a person who doesn't know how to get rid of his or her multifaceted expressions of pride, envy, anger, lust, greed, sloth, and gluttony. But each step towards Humbleness, Divine Love, and Divine Forgiveness will help you gradually shed the burden of status addiction's smelly, toxic, thorn-covered leaves.

The leaves that grow in their place are Peace.

LSP19: Learning How to Breathe: Finding Freedom of Spirit in a World That Tries to Crush You

Dr. Alexander and I grew up at roughly the same time.  He was born in late 1953, and I was born in mid-1958. So we've been exposed to a lot of the same influences over the years. We both grew up in that short breath of time between the end of one era (the world that died with WWII) and the start of a new era (the world that began with widespread computers networks).Yet, for all the similarities between Dr. Alexander and myself in those early years -- the books, the films, the TV shows, and the unforgettable music -- there were many differences. Each of us belonged to a particular time and place and culture, and each of us still carries the lessons of time and place and culture within us. Those lessons shaped us. To this day, the experiences of our youth affect how we claim -- and proclaim -- our spiritual life today.

How does culture shape our spiritual journey? Is there such a thing as a universal culture of Oneness that transcends all earthly differences? Do all people who connect deeply with God inevitably end up in the same place? Do we become carbon copies of each other and God?

Last time, I talked about some of the problems posed by Gnosticism. I know I've complained about Gnosticism before (sorry about that), but I keep coming back to it because it's had such a powerful influence on our spiritual lives -- not just now, but in centuries long past. I keep thinking . . . why?  Why do Gnostic ideas keep rearing their dopey heads? And why do people keep listening to them?

I've boiled it down to one painful answer. I think Gnosticism becomes very attractive to people who've noticed they can no longer breathe.

I mean this in a spiritual and emotional sense rather than a physical sense. 

In Johnson's Canyon, Alberta, you'd think the steep rock walls towering on both sides of the river would make you feel claustrophobic, but instead there's a sense that you've stepped into a unique pocket of beauty where God is telling a story that's different from the narratives of the surrounding mountain terrain. I think part of what makes Johnson's Canyon so popular and so appealing is its ability to surprise us. Our souls long to be delighted and surprised by unexpected turnings on the path of life. Unfortunately for us in today's society, the brain's System 2 circuits despise unexpected . . . well . . . unexpected anything. System 2's need to maintain intense perfectionistic control over all aspects of life is one of the hallmarks of status addiction in the brain.

Breath, as a metaphor for life in all its complexity, has been linked by innumerable authors to the elusive concept of "spirit." The Book of Genesis is crystal clear on the connection. (Ruah in Hebrew means divine wind, natural spirit of man, and breath.) But you don't have to believe in the Bible to feel the link between breath and freedom of life, freedom of spirit. When you live in a culture that gives you the freedom to be yourself, you feel alive and free and full of purpose. When you live in a culture that forbids you to be yourself, you feel suffocated and frustrated and low in spirit.

It's bad enough living in a culture that forbids you to be yourself. When you live in a culture governed by status addiction, it's even worse. You feel choked to death by all the rules and expectations and lies. You feel trapped, unable to feel your core self drawing the breath of life and love and spirit. You long to escape just so you can remember what it feels like to be at peace in your own skin.

Gnosticism appears to offer you that escape. Gnosticism starts by affirming your impression that you feel miserable as hell (which you do). Then it says you have a small spark of God inside you that's desperate to return to its Source (which sounds kind of right because you can feel your inner longing to breathe). Then it tells you there's a "good" place (somewhere off in Creation where Source exists) and an "evil" place (which may look a lot like your local neighbourhood gang headquarters). Last, it promises that if you possess the secret knowledge given by the prophesied saviour figure, you can escape all the evil and return to the good place, where everybody blends together in a blissful state of "oneness." 

You know what's missing from this pretty little Gnostic picture? Self honesty.

Gnosticism is designed to shift your focus and attention away from the bad decisions you and your neighbours are making right here and right now. Gnosticism gives you a way to make excuses for the humongous problems created by status addiction.

Once you fully accept the harm created in our society by status addiction, there's no need whatsoever to claim that God scattered small bits of evil throughout the universe. It's status addiction that crushes the heart out of people and takes away their chance to breathe. It's status addiction writ large across communities in the form of "noble cultural traditions" that ruins lives.

As it happens, I didn't grow up in a culture steeped in status addiction. Sure, there were currents of status anxiety here and there, and some of them were pretty ugly. But by and large, the Canada I grew up in was relatively egalitarian compared to most other nations at the time. I'm not saying Canada was problem-free. I'm saying I learned at a fairly early age how to breathe.

And I didn't need Gnosticism to do it.

What I've learned on the Spiral Path is that when you strip away the claustrophobic demands and expectations of status addiction, you get an incredible sense of expansion in your life. You get this feeling of being able to breathe from deep inside your gut. Suddenly you can enjoy the best things in your culture -- the books, the films, the TV shows, the music -- without being afraid for your soul's salvation. You gradually learn how to sort out what your soul likes and what your soul doesn't like. You stick with what you like, and you respect your neighbour's right to like something else. We don't all have to be the same.

Did you see this week's story about Sister Cristina Scuccia, Italy's "Singing Nun," who won Italy's version of The Voice by really rockin' it from her heart and soul?

There's a person who knows how to breathe.


For Further Reflection:

You know that feeling of constantly needing to check your smartphone and desperately hoping for likes on your most recent post? That compulsion about spending time on your social media pages, a compulsion that won't go away no matter how much you tell yourself to ignore it? That rationalization telling you it's okay to text while you're driving and ignore your children while you're checking for likes one last time?

That's status addiction.

Bearing in mind how many people have this feeling every day, would it be fair to say that countless millions of people have a problem with addiction and don't even realize it?

Yes, it would be a fair and honest thing to say.

The problem with any kind of addiction, whether it's status addiction or an addiction to sex or substances, is the way it messes with our brain networks and prevents us from being our best selves. This isn't news, of course, to anyone who's discovered the power of denial and deceit to disguise addiction. Denial and deceit give our brains the momentum needed to suppress the soul's morality of boundaries and choose the brain's morality of Oneness instead. It's the morality of Oneness, with its focus on blurred boundaries, communalism, and rights without responsibilities, that allows us to rationalize the crimes we commit during the throes of our cravings.

It may not seem reasonable to you that God allows your biological brain to wander off on technological tangents and succumb to the evils of denial and deceit, but this is the only way God can offer you the chance to experience redemption without in any way harming your eternal soul.

Jesus was among a rare group of religious thinkers for whom the path of redemption was the only way to reestablish a relationship with God. In practical terms, the path of redemption means being honest enough to see the perils of a morality of Oneness and being courageous enough to set aside Oneness for a morality of boundaries. This is what he wrote in the Letter of James (parts of which I'm certain were written by Jesus himself in his own highly literate hand):

"But be doers of the word, and not merely hearers who deceive themselves. For if any are hearers of the word and not doers, they are like those who look at themselves in a mirror; for they look at themselves [at the face of their birth] and, on going away, immediately forget what they were like. But those who look into the perfect law, the law of liberty, and persevere, being not hearers who forget but doers who act -- they will be blessed in their doing" (James 1: 22-25).

On your own spiritual journey, you need to be able to look in the mirror and recognize yourself. You need to be able to remember who you are at all times so you're not vulnerable to the lies that other people are trying to tell you.

The freedom to be yourself and to breathe in the wonder of your own uniqueness as a child of God will help you find the daily blessings you so long for in your life.

LSP13: How I Met Your Mother: A Divine Love Story

When you're very, very big and very, very smart, it's not easy to be humble.

This is a truth we can see during our lives as human beings. All around us, we lament what happens to our lives when certain individuals and groups decide they're better than other people.

We see what happens when individuals and groups who have more money, more education, more ideas, and more influence refuse to help other people with these gifts, but instead use these gifts to abuse. We see how the fruits of "chosenness" destroy peace in our world. We see how peace isn't possible when it's more important for us to be "better" and "chosen" than "egalitarian" and "humble" toward our neighbours. And we see how hard it is for individuals of great privilege to consider themselves no more important than anybody else on Planet Earth.

This is obvious to us as human beings, but it's not obvious to us at all during our lives as angels, as persons-of-soul, as children of God on the Other Side. So when our beloved Mother and Father tell us their ancient love story -- "How I Met Your Mother" -- there are parts of the story that just don't make any sense to us. Many angels are shocked and baffled by the early part of the story, the part where two "big and smart" people meet in the jungle of pre-Big-Bang energy fields and try very hard to outsmart and outdo each other because neither one knows anything about humbleness or love.

The details of their story are personal and private, of course, as you'd expect when we're talking about our divine parents, but suffice it to say that these two very different consciousnesses found redemption in the joy that comes from being humble.

I call this photo Divine Love. It's another one of the photos I took with a fogged over lens at the Etobicoke conservatory. Divine Love is soft, kind, mysterious, puzzling, a bit hard to put labels on, and much easier to see with your peripheral vision than with the focused vision in the centre of your eye. It's almost as if you're using your eyes to hear God's quiet voice. Photo credit JAT.

Over the years, I've come across a small number of people who understand that God the Mother and God the Father -- far from being aloof, transcendent, and unemotional -- are, in fact, truly humble. They're both very, very big and very, very smart, but they don't think they're "better" than any of their children. Their immense love -- the love that so many humans have felt over the centuries -- is only possible because of their humbleness.

As our human lives teach us, humbleness is not inevitable. It's a choice. It's an exercise of free will -- an exercise of free will that's so brave it's almost beyond comprehension (which is why some of us come here to figure it out). It's a choice to be totally honest about who you are and what you can do (thereby not denying your talents) while at the same time you're deeply grateful for somebody's else's talents. There's no jealousy, no envy, no competition. No power games, no worship, no glory. There's just tons and tons of gratitude.

This is what it's like to live on the Other Side as a person-of-soul. This is what it's like to be a child of God who's loved for who you really are. The feeling of being safe in Divine Love is the feeling of being safe in yourself. No one will judge you or demand that you change because your favourite colour is pink instead of black. There's no fear involved in simply being you. Humbleness is one of the anchoring points of this safety.

Just as we're called to open our hearts to our human neighbours and honour them with the gift of humbleness (thereby participating in the experience of divine redemption), so are we called to offer the same safety and dignity to our blessed Mother and Father. Go ahead and be awed and amazed by the wonder of who they really are -- I'm amazed by them all the time! -- but don't diminish your relationship with them by insisting you're unworthy of their love and trust. They don't see it that way (despite what you've been told by religious leaders). They see you as one of their children, no matter what you did yesterday that wasn't so nice.

Instead of getting on your knees to pray, stand up, hold onto your neighbour's hand, look God right in the eye, and be honest about how much your heart is hurting and how much help you need during your time as a human being on Planet Earth. Be humble. Admit you don't know everything and can't do everything. Ask for help in being the best "frail mortal human being" you can be. Ask for help in being who you really are.

It's all anyone can do.


For Further Reflection:

Have you ever had the feeling that no matter how hard you try to move forward on your spiritual path, you're constantly blocked?

You're not alone. Most people have this feeling. I had it during the early years of my own journey, and I still remember how discouraged and frustrated I felt.

I was sure I was doing everything I was supposed to be doing (that is, what spiritual and religious leaders had told me to do). I logically concluded that the practices themselves were fine -- because so many spiritual leaders agreed on the merits of intercessory prayer, fasting, meditation, self-dissolution, and the like -- so if the practices weren't working . . . the problem must be me!

It didn't occur to me for the longest time that I wasn't the problem. It was the ancient and very popular spiritual practices that were the problem.

Even after my guardian angel told me countless times that I was worthy of God's love and forgiveness, I didn't want to believe him. I assumed I just wasn't trying hard enough to master those ancient spiritual practices, so I redoubled my efforts. Then tripled them.

What I got for all my trouble was a sense of being further away from God.

Divine Love, as it turns out, is not about Oneness. It's about Humbleness. It's about feeling wonder and gratitude for our differences. It's about rejoicing in our unique talents and using them to benefit others. It's about encouraging our loved ones to see themselves as beautiful. It's about having a shared morality based on boundaries -- respectful, mature, courteous boundaries. Without a proper understanding of boundaries, it's too easy for the really big, really smart people to take advantage of those who have different gifts.

A morality of boundaries (Divine Love) is the complete opposite of a morality of Oneness.

Many of the spiritual practices endorsed today evolve directly from a morality of Oneness. The practices make perfect sense if your goal is to achieve a sense of Oneness, a sense of blurred boundaries, a sense of transcending yourself.

But getting closer to God actually means building "new and improved" boundaries, not dissolving your boundaries. To feel Divine Love, to feel God's presence in your life, you need to start from scratch by asking God to help you learn about the spiritual practice of Humbleness.

Just so you know . . . in doing so, you'll be giving up any pretense of chosenness or election or spiritual enlightenment or Ascension. You'll simply be asking to know yourself better and to know your Divine Parents better.

From the tree trunk of Humbleness spring the fruits of deep connection with a humble God.

It's through finding your own Humbleness that you'll share in the Divine Love story of a Mother and Father who love you very much.